MEGA POST WEEK: Going Shopping

Get up, Lazybones!

 It's Saturday, and you know what that means...

 Shopping!

 

 And we have a very important impending occasion looming, don't we?

 Let's have a little talk, Ladies.

And guys.

I've made it clear I'm not a make up person.

I've never worn the stuff.

The skin is a very different matter.

My 51 year old face has belonged to Oil of Olay since it was 16,

and until recently, that was working out for me.

However, the 85 pound weight loss left me with under eye bags I could pack for a week at Disney.

 I considered an expensive $65 solution that the painted face at Macy's recommended,

but $65 is a lot of hot glue.

A couple of weeks ago, I added this to my anti-aging arsenal.

 2 drops under each eye, smooth with a fingertip, and LITERALLY watch the drastic change.

The hardest part was not grinning for 3 minutes as instructed by the product.

For $11, I was a believer.

You can pick this product up at Walmart, and then Girls, pack your bags.

 While you're at Walmart, hit the Better Homes clearance section.

Slashed from $2.97 to a paltry $1, my pumpkin pie is going to look even better on these.

As always, their costume jewelry selection has some cute, tasteful pieces

that make a perfect little something extra.

And again for $5, even an unemployed college student can afford to

give his girlfriend's mom a little something.

 A quick slide into Bed, Bath and Beyond will score you a mantle full of stocking stuffers.

That big piece of real estate known as my dining table will go arcade Christmas morning

for a mere $5.

 Also for $5, I can have The Minions in training for the next Olympics.

All that close, intricate work Thom, my own personal mad scientist does

will be perfectly illuminated by this.

 $8.99 will turn your child's room into Sea World with this projecting everywhere.

It also comes in constellations and several other varieties to suit any Minion.

 Here's few ideas on appreciated items to haul with you in case you're fortunate enough

to be invited elsewhere for the feast.

What hostess couldn't use some attractive little color coordinated towels?

They have a few different bundles to choose from if you're more into turkeys.

 5 for $10?

I could use some of those!

 On a day with unexpected folks dropping by, a couple of extra napkins could come in handy,

just in case your caramel apple pie is just that legendary.

 Embroidered fingertip towels are good to have on hand for when Cousin Betsy's 

five year old forgets to wash before drying.

Again.

 These napkin rings are simple enough to match anyone's table.

A little glitter, some gilded leaves, beads, and maybe a sequin or 12 and they'd be AWESOME.

 So you did a dry run on the settings, and it still seemed kind of dry?

$15 will get you some cutwork OOMPH.

 36 inches is the right size to anchor the centerpiece without being in the line of gravy fire.

 Do you know a couple just starting out?

This 6 inch Kissing Crystal is such sparkly lusciousness 

anyone would stop to smooch.

 Yes.

Please.

I don't even care why.

$8.99.

 The usual candy tower makes sense when it's served up in covered, reusable boxes.

My niece would like the glimmering leopard even after the chocolate disappeared.

 Making your gifts?

Buying the boring bathrobe?

Baked up some fruitcake that weighs 20 pounds and smells like sulfer?

 Pack it to go in one of these fake gift boxes.

 Enjoy the added horror on their faces as they unwrap mopheads for dog feet.

 New parents will eye you like you're Satan.

If they don't, call DCF.

 Go ahead and confirm your teenager's fears that you are the most out of touch idiot EVA.

 For $4.99, it's not only worth it, but the look of relief when they find the box

only contains a harmless fruitcake is priceless!

 Although, there's a part of me that wishes to God this was a real product.

 This tea sampler is heaven for the boiled leaf lover on your list.

12 different flavors for $9.99?

Delicious, calming bliss.

 I love this one for many reasons.

This sturdy two foot high metal cage in a classic tree shape has a heavy base,

an easy access door to refill it, and it's stuffed with aromatic, high end potpourri

in a variety of fragrances.

 Priced at $29.99, this would be a great hostess offering, kitchen centerpiece, powder room 

decoration, or better yet~

a really thoughtful day brightener for someone in the hospital or a nursing home.

 An elderly relative who can no longer handle a real tree would love you forever.

 Want to encourage the kids to clean up between gorging on pounds of chocolate?

These little soap dispensers are only $2, and the scented soaps are VERY fragrant.

The peppermint penguin is coming home with us.

 Want something more sophisticated?

How about these fruity pumps for $1?

 These elegant metal sleeves pop right over them for $4.99.

Brushed nickle and oil rubbed bronze give them a trendy look, 

and that price makes them a deceptively affordable, practical hostess gift.

 Oh, YOU'RE the hostess???

And the powder room is...shall we say...shabby?

And not in the chic sense?

These oughta do it.

 These jeweled accessories will give you a fast, upscale update

that doesn't have to be packed away in January.

 Here's the whole price list.

Grab one or two items for impact, or pack the whole line up as

 a gift for your daughter's first apartment.

They aren't cheap, but there's 20% off BB&B coupons online too!

Subtlety not your thing?

I can relate.

Grab a good quality fabric shower curtain and resin hook set to make your bathroom

all kinds of merry and bright.

 My daughter is symbiotically attached to her iPod Shuffle,

and she studies constantly.

So do all of her friends.

That's pretty much an evening for that crew:

coffee, noses in the books, and music.

This $10 hard case turns an MP3 player into a stereo so you can groove out to

Steam Powered Giraffe while still arguing about coefficients.

Remember, Brainy Math Geek College Kids~

Don't Drink and Derive.

On your way home, don't pass up The Dollar Tree.

They've brought their A Game this year.

How about some chocolate for the stocking?

No kid will say no to THIS lump of coal.

No husband or boyfriend either.

If you have both...we need to talk.

Chanukah and Christmas decor alike could gain a little Wintery sparkle here.

$1 for 3 pretty beaded ornament drops?

Hang these in a window for a little icy shine, and they'd be a great package tie on

to distract people from the smell of that fruitcake.

Ready to get started?

Me too!

So...........

Headed for Walmart, Bed Bath and Beyond, 

and The Dollar Tree.

BRB.

If not back, avenge death.