What's Blooming?

New to Life in Rehab?

Kinda...different around her, isn't it?

We never wanted to be one of those "oh-look-how-perfect-our-house-and-kids-are" places.

Frankly, we're a flippin' mess.

You think we act crazy?

It's no act.

How did this insanity happen?

 Once upon a time, there was a cute guy from Virginia who hopped on a train and

and headed for Miami with several boxes of comics and a Yugo. 

He ran into a bad girl 7 years his senior with a townhouse on the water

and a bumper sticker that read:

Moody Bitch Seeks Kind Considerate Guy for Love/Hate Relationship. 

First date, November 12, 1988.

Romance was in the air.

Sparks flew, and 17 months later, they had a wedding that was a major crafting event.

The girl managed to cobble together a black tie affair with full buffet for 150

of their closest friends and family for $2000.

Welcome to the tone being set.

 The couple moved to a derelict house that needed a ton of work.

Once it was structurally sound and starting to look halfway decent,

they set it on fire.

 

 Their first major joint project was completed in July of 1991.

By their fifth anniversary, the couple was a quintet.

 And from there...it just got weird.

Being of limited means, they were unable to afford child care...

 ...but they did find creative alternatives.

Never have a bear watch your children.

We originally had a fourth.

 We've adjusted to three.

 And oh, how our garden has grown.

 Oddly close, aren't they?

And that's not posed either.

The Minions really are the best of friends.

 Figuring she'd done a fair job, the girl celebrated and sped off into

professional success in her 40s.

Soon after, the Minions were recovered wandering in the woods.

Yes, Arwen was once cute.

But we still love and torture cuddle her.

 Bears again, but the count is still three.
They also run faster now. 

 
We allowed them to enjoy their own tastes in fashion as
 long as no piercings or tattoos were involved.

A few additional guidelines were later added.

These started appearing, and we kept them.

Sure, we're a little embarrassed, but there are 15 Feline Overlords, and they're all family.
And FIXED.

 As the family grew, so did the Mom.

The boy still claims she never looked like this.

 He's a keeper.

When she was issued her own zip code, she admitted something needed to be done.

 After removing an organ, she was back to high school weight.

 When the boy shaved his head for charity, we had a shocker waiting.

When you look back, it's easy to see those little smiles.

All three children are in this photo, by the way.
My daughter would make her appearance in two months.

Thom weighed the same then as he does now.

This is the last known sighting of Savannah's tummy.

It was hard to resist eating them.

I came close a few times.

(Baby's first coffee.)

Unlike most children, as the grew, The Minions enjoyed photo ops even more,
hamming it up for the camera at the drop of a hat.

Christmas photos got odder...

...and odder...

...and odder...

But 24 years after that first date, this is our chaos.
This is how we've grown.
And we're happy to be able to share it with you guys every day.
Thank you for always stopping by, always saying hi,
and putting up with our lunacy.
You have no idea how much it means to us to have you be a part of
Life in Rehab.
We're sure on some level, it makes you feel a whole lot more normal, doesn't it?