I took way too many pictures.
My favorite room in the house isn't in the house at all.
It's just outside the dining room on the other side of the french doors.
It's dressed in sherbert shades and drips with orchids,
herbs, fledgling fruit trees nestled in pots
and a fountain that's more of an animal watering hole
than decorative accent.
It's my little slice of canvas covered heaven.
When the first rip in the fabric of my domain occurred,
I trotted over to Home Depot and returned with Tyvek tape and
a special waterproof canvas gel glue to repair it.
I'm happy to report, the fix has lasted for several months.
Then, things spiraled out of control...
The larger rips I could target and quell.
But what do you do with THIS???
It would take a skinny minute to figure out my canopy would be made
solely of tape, like a church camp craft wallet.
I'd have to put a flock of flamingos roosting in the front yard
and the Prius up on blocks to match an accent like that.
At least we could let the grass grow wild and toss the electric mower.
Maybe we could raise goats instead...
It was clearly time for an interweb search.
I found replacement canvases, sure.
Thank you, eBay!
New, in the box, and cheaper than the sticker price.
Now there's just one thing left to do.
Oh yeah, the salvaged Synagog chandelier has to come down too.
The boys disagreed, so we let it hang for a while,
but I was pretty sure I'd be proven right in the end.
Once everything was out of the way, the old tarp needed to be removed.
Cluckford III was understandably nervous.
Anything else vacated the area.
Okay, quit smiling, that was the easy part.
If you're wondering, in between shots I was steadying ladders,
hugging calves, and calming my mother down, who was
shrilly yelling such useful things as, "Careful!"
and "Watch out!" from the dining room.
Cluckford III wasn't our only skeptical audience.
Boo hung around to cast baleful looks.
The first thing you have to put up is the air vent.
Thom is the tallest and has no fear of heights.
He's really part spider monkey, but that's a part of my past we don't discuss.
We also took this opportunity to get the Christmas lights off the house.
We aren't the last in the neighborhood to do this.
The folks across the street still turn theirs on.
Okay, the first piece is up!
And please notice that by now, the chandelier chain...
...is holding nothing.
Drape the second, larger tarp over the framework.
First, fit it around the vent in the center.
Anchor the corners.
Then get the center struts.
Replace the chandelier.
Admit your mother was right.
Well I was.
Start moving the furnishings, decorations, and designer accent cats back onto the patio.
Of course, I'll be taking this opportunity to rearrange.
A nice reading nook for Mom, nestled in with my orchids.
A nice shady nook for Molester and her baby, Smidgeon.
A good flow to the grill.
And a spot for Dad to comfortably settle in with Game of Thrones or the iPad.
The sensory timer turns on all the lights at dusk.
Have a seat, I'll grab some refreshments.