If you have small children or a delicate sensibility, close my site immediately. This is not for the faint of heart.
This THING is in my living room in the corner opposite the front door, in plain site. Please notice the randomly chosen tile that the colorblind former owners mistook for taste. To be fair, it did match the flamingo-pink carpet they put down over the wood floors.
No, I'm not kidding. And they color matched the vertical blinds too. So you now know what our first project was after we got the keys.
The banded details are mere painted plaster, and the stone is the same facade they had covering one wall in the fire room and the front of the house. I have since sledged that crap off, but the fireplace appears to have been done with cement mixed by Superman. I've gotten one stone off. That took a ridiculous amount of time. I'll have grandchildren before I accomplish that.
So I am now taking suggestions. Besides explosives and abandoning the house, what would you do with this fake stone edifice in a Spanish style Deco era beach house?