I Usually Don't Like to Use Labels, BUT...

 

 So, how's the house coming, Virtual Besties?

All fetid and festooned in frightening fierceness?

Chateau Inferno is nearly sufficiently haunted for tomorrow's promised

Hideous House Tour.

But before we entertain you at your final destination,

as good hosts, we need to stock the bar, don't we?

A selection of slimy libations await you...

and we'll supply you with your own to take home!

All you need for this project is a printer (or access to one),

scissors, adhesive, food coloring and a container. 

This project is terminally easy.

And you are all about to become 

Honorary Evil Rehab Minions!

 You may remember this bottle as having French soda in it.

I acquired it, full, at Big Lots for $3.

Don't drown in a pool of his own blood despair though if you don't possess this perfect vessel;

an old pickle or jelly jar works too, or a wine bottle and cork, or an empty olive oil 

bottle. It's not important. Just make it glass, and make it clean.

Now drag and scrape down the stairs to the dungeon.

 At least that's where we keep our food coloring.

 Brutally splatter a few gallons drops of your chosen deadly night shade

in the bottom of the bottle.

Add water and hit him over the head with a shovel shake to mix.

There's no need to hide the body fill the bottle completely.

You want it to look as if you've poisoned the neighbors used some of the elixir.

 

 Print some handily horrifying labels out and choose one.

Carefully hack her to death with a kitchen knife cut the label out.

 Pardon me a second....

CRASH 

 OOF                                                                 SMASH  

*SCREAM*                                 

         MEOW

OH MY GOD  HELP!!!

 

 Now, if you don't have a desire to create life from inanimate body parts one of these, GET ONE.

This dispenses death from above adhesive in dry, neat lines.

You simply roll over them with your car a label with no mess!

You're definitely going to need this to label the unidentified corpses gifts in a jar this Christmas.

 Just stick the toaster in the bathtub label on the jar and smooth it down.

Done!

 Okay, do a whole bunch more.

 You're now saying, hold up, Redhead!

Where am I supposed to find all these cool labels,

and what's it gonna run me?

 You'll find them in here...

 ...and you'll find that they're free!

 Come in...

 ...don't be afraid...

 ...we'll show you...

 There's a whole bunch of cool labels below!

Right click and save to your computer, resize if you need to,

and create your own mad scientist's work space!

For even more labels, visit HERE.

These are free for the printing, so chill on the guilt.

After all...

we don't have the antidote for that!