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This was probably not a good choice for this week, huh?

Get Your Irish On!

Happy Saint Patrick's Day!

 It's time for a little wearing o'the green!

Nothing wrong with that, right?

 Okay, maybe there are a few things wrong.

However there's nothing wrong with the following recipe,

straight from my BFF, Michael, owner of the blog
Diabetes Done Right. 

Making soda bread with a little twist will surprise and delight your family,

and the prep time is under 15 minutes.

Lord Reilly’s Irish Soda Bread

  

3 cups flour

1/2 cup sugar

1/2 tsp. baking soda

2 tsp. baking powder

1 tsp. salt

16 oz. container sour cream

1 egg, slightly beaten

1 cup Craisins…. YES CRAISINS!!!

  

Mix all dry ingredients well. Add egg and sour cream. Fold ingredients with floured hands until well combined, but not overly mixed. Bake at 375 degrees in greased 9” cake pan for about 50-60 minutes or until the loaf sounds hollow when tapped. Enjoy!

Do yourself a favor and double this...you're going to want some for breakfast! 

For more of my favorite Irish recipes, click HERE.

So meanwhile, wanna have a little fun?

I went to one of those sites where you supply your on-hand ingredients

 and they give you a recipe using them:

Pineapple

Insecticide

Adobo

Window cleaner

Crystal doorknob

I've never seen automated profanity before. 

And I appear to have been blocked.

In Memorial

Wednesday afternoon, I was at Lowes when I got the call.

Mark was with me, saw me start to collapse, and ran across the store,

 barely keeping me on my feet.

As soon as I could breathe again, I told him what had happened, 

and he took my car keys from me.

My younger sister, Jennifer, had had a massive heart attack

and was gone.

Bright, funny, and popular, she was also beautiful.

We grew up at the beach and were always tanned and sporting

bleached out hair from hours in the sun.

 Jen married her childhood sweetheart a couple months after my wedding...

 

 ...and my nephew, Chip, is just 4 months younger than Samwow.

He's a little older now.

 My niece is a Junior in high school and has been college shopping

with her mom, so they spent Jen's last few weekends together alone.

Athough she was in a meeting at the hospital where she was head of HR,

we still lost her at the way-too-young age of 49.

There will be a lot less laughter in this world without her.

The Hard Hearted Chef: Decadent Stuffed Artichokes

 Behold the artichoke.

An intimidating morsel that most are afraid to tackle.

You're about to be amazed at how easy an elegant side dish is to create.

Gather the following and get ready to wow your crew!

• 6 whole artichokes
• 3 cups Italian bread crumbs
• 1 clove garlic, minced
• 1/8 cup chopped fresh parsley

• 1/4 cup grated Romano cheese
• 1/2 teaspoon dried oregano
• 5 tablespoons olive oil, divided
• salt and pepper to taste

 Snip off the points of the leaves and cut off the very top of the choke.

 Cut off the stems, leaving a flat bottom.

 This is what you should have.

 Now, take those tight little veggies...

 ...grasp it firmly by the base and give it a firm rap on the cutting board.

 You want it open and the leaves loose.

 Smack it again if necessary.

Take out a little aggression.

 This is what you're looking for.

Mix the remaining ingredients into a paste, drizzling in more oil if needed.

 Stuff the mixture into each artichoke as shown.

Place them in a dutch oven, filling any empty space with crumpled foil

to keep them upright.

Add water and 2 tablespoons of oil up to the top of the lower leaves.

Bring to a boil, then lower the heat to a simmer and cover.

This will take about an hour.

When the leaves are tender and pull out easily, you're ready to serve them

with a little melted butter for dipping.

You just elevated Tuesday past hotdog night.

It's not a tough recipe, it's good for you, and you can tell the kids it's from another planet.

They'll scarf it up.  

Inspiration Point: Wanna Come to a Party?

While I was remodeling my mother's house,

 one day, the van broke down and had to be towed to my mechanic's,

leaving me stranded at the condo.

Eventually, my buddy, Mark and I got hungry, so we decided to strike out on foot 

in the Spring dusk and see what the neighborhood had to offer.

Not 1/4 mile away we stumbled upon a strip mall with a little sports bar.

Since we're both former athletes and wing enthusiasts, this was an easy choice.

It turned out to be a Cheers situation.

And the bar is owned by a police officer and his wife,

it's frequented by the force,

so it's a very fun, safe atmosphere.

They also oblige me by stocking non-alcoholic beer.

We both hooked up with outside work and a social life from there.

The universe is a funny thing.

 Yesterday was the head bartender's baby shower.

 With 200 guests in attendance, everyone chipped in to decorate, cook,

bake, create, and general havoc ensued.

This was one of THREE buffets!

 Our mom-to-be's mother hand made all of the decorations.

I'd make a hoot pun here, but that's beneath even me.

Swagged banners sported the baby's name...

 ...and some very practical onesies.

This kid has clothes, let me tell you.

And shoes.

I bought seven pairs alone.

She's the Imelda Marcos of the drool posse.

 This is the gift table before the party started.

You heard me.

 I was privy to the theme in advance, so my package tie-on was a pink

washcloth owl puppet.

 The decorations weren't the owlnly

avian touches.

It took us a while to brave messing this arrangement up.

 Eventually, the call of provolone and salami proved too much.

 These were the table decorations.

Clever, inexpensive, easy, and what an impact!

 I have a question...

does anyone ever eat these?

 Every seat in the house was eventually filled,

the bar was packed, and outside tables were spilling over.

Now, this shindig was co-ed, so how do you get a bunch of cops, carpenters, 

pavers and painters to enjoy a pink party?

Oh, we have ways.

 You have your lovely bartender fill baby bottles with domestic draft...

 ...and then you get the guys involved in a bottle chugging competition!

I wasn't going to miss this spectacle for the world!  

 Our cheerful proprietress doled out the suds.

 I'm not sure I can ever face these guys again.

Mom was quite pleased with the soiree,

and Baby Amelia is set for her first months of being adored.

Lose the hat, Mom.

Going Shopping

Just before Christmas, I went back to the corporate world.

I traded my tool belt for a territory...

 ...and my steel toed Brahma Boots for pumps.

These are nowhere near as comfortable, let me tell you.

 So today, I'll be sporting these.

Why, what do you wear to clean the house?

I'm taking advantage of everyone being out to purge 

Chateau Inferno before the Minions descend for Spring Break.

I get to cook enormous amounts of food again!

I hope I remember how.

I'll also be trying to keep Seamus, the new puppy,

from eating the ears off my zebras.

So...

Going to Publix and Walmart.

BRB.

If not back, avenge death.

(Zebra slippers available at Walmart, $5.

I promise to put on real shoes when I go.)