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Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Hey, Rocky, Watch Me Pull a Rabbit Out of My Hat

Nothing up my sleeve....

 I was having brunch at a friend's house a couple years ago, and this woman is perfect. Her house is always immaculate, the pool sparkles, the cars are pristine, the lawn is manicured. She ducked into her laundry room to grab linens, and I saw IT...the black hole where filth goes to die. I really relaxed around her after finding out she's human like the rest of us.

We all in the house.
That filthy, disgusting jumble of crap.
Even Monica Geller on Friends had a closet crammed with junk
in her otherwise OCD fueled world.
My craft and desk area used to be located in the Florida room,
but when Mom moved in, I had to relocate all my stuff to the dining room.
Often, I work up to time for dinner.
Do I take tons of time to put everything away?
Are you kidding?
 This catastrophe is in my dining room.
Next to my table.
Where we EAT.
Where I entertain.
This is just not working out.
For this little disappearing act, you'll need a sewing machine, a queen size sheet the color of your
walls ($10 at Walmart), buttons, scissors, and a measuring tape.
If you have basic sewing skills and an hour, you can pull off a disappearing act.
1. Measure the top of the shelves and add 1" to the dimensions.
2. Cut a rectangle that size
3. Measure the height of the shelves and the circumference
4. Measuring the fabric from the bottom up, cut a rectangle that size. Add 1" to the length,
2" to the circumference. We're going to save some work and use the hems that are already sewn
in the sheet.
5. Sew a hem in the raw edge of the length
6. Center the corner of the circumference to the front middle of first small rectangle you cut.
Pin this edge all the way around, making sure you have a 1" overlap in the front
7. Stitch
8. Plan your button holes on the flap that overlaps in the front and sew them. I did 7.
You can also just do ribbon ties with bows
9. Sew on your buttons
 10. GONE
Since it matches the wall, the whole mess melts away!
My sanity was worth 10 bucks and an hour.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to slipcover the upstairs hallway...


DogsMom said...

Your reference to Monica made me laugh.
Did you ever wonder about the weird door in the middle of the living room on the Big Bang Theory?
I bet it is another black hole.

Heather Rodman said...

Awesome! Here at the tractor shop, when a job is completed, we say that the machine is "buttoned up", or if a job needs to be completed ASAP, we tell the tech to "button that up"! Great idea, and nice execution. :)